This Is How I Would Hold A Baby!
by thehalfbloodprincess
Summary: James has planned out the rest of their life, Lily gets freaked out by the idea of it. Script taken almost exactly from an episode of Friends. Oneshot LJ fluff.


Lily and James stepped out onto the Quidditch pitch, James carrying the box full of balls. Lily was very nervous, she had never played Quidditch before, she was only doing this to placate James. He set down the case of balls. They began with a few basic flying techniques; Lily wasn't too bad, according to James she was a natural. Afterwards, they returned to the ground to retrieve the balls. James produced a large round red one. "Here, take the Quaffle," he said, "We'll start with some basic passing and shooting drills." Lily took the Quaffle and held it at arms length, looking unsure of what to do with it. James refrained from laughing with difficulty. He tried to think of a way Lily might be able to relate to. Most women were good with babies. "Hold it like you'd hold a baby. You know, kind of cradle it under your arm."

Lily looked at him incredulously, "This is how I would hold a baby!" she said. This time it was James turn to look incredulous. "I'm not very good with kids," she admitted, "I haven't really been around very many, I mean, you know, since I was one."

"Oh, well that's alright," said James understandingly, "I'm sure you'll feel totally different when it's our baby."

"Whoa, wait, what?" asked Lily, completely caught off guard.

"What?" asked James, obviously oblivious to the fact that he had said something peculiar.

"You think about stuff like that?" she asked, gobsmacked.

"Well, yeah," James replied, "I, er, I kind of think it would be nice if we had two babies."

"Two? Two babies?" asked Lily.

"Yeah. You know, one of each, a boy and a girl." He said simply.

"Then what's going to happen?" she asked, her voice a few pitches higher than usual.

"Well," He answered as though this was a perfectly normal question, "We'll probably want to raise the kids away fro the city so we'll probably move to, er, Godric's Hollow."

"Uh-huh?" Lily responded, nearing hysterics.

"Yeah, that way I figure, you know, we'll be far enough away from our parents that we don't have to see them all the time but close enough that they can come over and baby-sit whenever we want. And yes, I know, the taxes are a little higher than, let's say, Ottery St. Catchpole, but the primary school system for witches and wizards is supposedly great." James replied.

"Wow. Wow, that's great. Great. Ok, wow, you know what?" she asked.

"Huh?" asked James, finally cluing in that something was wrong.

"Er, I'm kind of tired, so, er, you take this," she said handing him back the Quaffle, "And, er, I'm going to go take a nap, yeah, a nap." And she left the pitch mumbling to herself.

James went after her and found her a few minutes later sitting in an armchair in the common room, pretending to be reading a book, though her eyes were not moving. "Hey," he said, "What happened back there?"

"I don't know," she said, putting down her book resignedly, "You tell me! One minute, I'm holding a Quaffle like a baby and the next I'm living in Godric's Hollow with two kids, and I'm complaining about the taxes!"

"Well I'm sorry, I think about stuff." James said, "You're at school, you're supposed to be paying attention, but you're not, your mind wanders."

"James, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks." she said.

"C'mon, what, you never think about our future?" he asked.

"Yes, but I, I think about where we're going to have dinner next Saturday night. I do not think about what our children's' names are going to be!" James made a strange movement with his head, "Oh my goodness. You know what our children's names are going to be?" Lily asked in amazement.

"No, well, I mean, you know, I, I read a book and there was a boy named Harry and I thought, I thought that might be good." He said, a little embarrassedly.

Lily eyed him skeptically, "What was the book?"

"The Big Book of Children's Names." James admitted sheepishly.

"Ok, James, listen, what we have is amazing." Lily said

"Yeah." He agreed.

"But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent most of my life like that. I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are going to have to deal with that." She explained.

"Ok fine." He said.

"Thank you." She said, then got up to return to her dormitory.

"We're not done." He informed her.

She stopped in her tracks and turned around, "I didn't know that."

"Ok, then you're going to have to understand that you're with a guy who's not going to stop planning his future with you because he's liked you for a long time and he knows that we're going to end up together and if that scares you, tough, 'cause you're going to have to deal with that." Said James very passionately.

"Fine, I will." Said Lily, turning again to go up to her dormitory.

"Good, 'cause I love you." James called to her

"Oh yeah." She called back.

"Yeah." He said.

"Well I love you too." Lily called.

"Well that's the first time we've said that." James realized.

Lily took this in, "Yes it is."

"Well, I'm going to kiss you." James decided.

"Well you'd better." Lily ordered.

And so he did.


End file.
